constant progress..

I was able to spend a little time with dad today. It was a pleasant time. He was excited to see me and gave me a big kiss (while my head got crushed by his halo ;) )

he was really working hard to tell me some things --- specifically that he things his house is too big and needs to downsize and that he wants to make sure that his disability is coming in every month to take care of mom. You need to understand that it takes a lot of work to piece together what he is saying and come up with a complete thought --- once i repeated back to him what i thought he wanted to say, he emphatically said "yes" and was very pleased.

we are told that the doctor will re-evaluate him in about 3-4 weeks and see where he stands. the halo is still on and very aggravating, but he's dealing with it. they are working hard to get him as much therapy as possible.

please pray that dad will participate in the therapy so he can continue to improve. he really does like company, so if you are in Indy, he'd love to show you around and introduce you to his nurses.

Realized another week has gone by so thought I should drop you all a line. Dad is moving along. He has difficult days and good days but being the strong man that he is, gets through them. The VA hospital has been wonderful to dad. They are very attentive to his needs and are always looking for a better way to get him to the next step.

This week dads visiting hours were cut to how often mom and the family saw dad in order to move him past the fixation of going home so that he could focus on his therapy. Although this has been hard on mom to only see dad 1 hr a day, and the kids 2 hrs at a time on the weekends, the process seems to be working for dad. He is now partcipating in his therapy again and handles us coming and going in a calmer manner. We know this is temporary and will do what it takes for him to get better.

During the times we are not visiting the hosptial has activities planned all day to keep dad busy and more occupied with getting better, we are thankful for all the staff that take care him. Continue to pray for the healing of his brain and neck injuries.

Kelli :o)

Halo

We were advised yesterday that the halo must stay for another 4 weeks. Dads neck is healing very slowly, it is starting to fuse but has not healed.

Please pray for healing of his neck so that it can come off earlier.

Also pray for the healing of dad's brain that he can move on to the next process it has been a very frustrating week for him.

Kelli

Wow, this week just flew by. Our apologies for no updates this week. We will make sure that we write more often.

Dad took a swallow test on Monday and is now eating a pureed diet. The only thing the feeding tube is used for is medications. Dad is enjoying his ability to eat (except for today, he told the nurse it was horrible..ha) and he gets all the ice cream he wants. I brought a gallon of his favorite of which he can scoop in the kitchen at anytime. Dad has always loved ice cream and would live off it if we let him.

We had the family meeting with the hospital on Friday. They took a CT scan of his neck and will compare it on monday with the scan from Parkview. This will determine when the halo comes off and the next steps to his broken neck recovery.

At this point, the recovery period here at the VA hospital is 3-5 weeks. In all, it's just a take each day as it comes and see what tomorrow brings. Dad continues to improve each day and it's up to him how long the treatment will last. We will continue to keep you posted.

The week has had it's ups and downs. There has been a few hours of aggitation per day but in all it's been a good week. Dad really misses the visitors he used to get though. Please see the mailing address and phone number below, we encourage you to write and call so that he knows he's not forgotten. I would like to plaster his walls with drawings from the kids that would like to send pictures to grandpa and cards from his family and friends. The hospital told us to make his room feel as comfortable as possible, I would love to see it full of love from everyone he knows. He really needs to feel the love right now.

VA Hospital
1481 W 10th Street
Indianapolis IN 46202

Patient: Jim Maley Rm C-4146

Phone: 317-988-3590

Keep in mind that if you call that Dad's conversations do not always make sense. He will do his best to talk to you, therapy advised that if you grasp what he is talking about to repeat back to him so his mind can work on putting it into perspective.

If you want to come to Indy and visit dad my house is always open and you are welcome to spend the night. You can call me at 317-578-4525. I know that Dad would love seeing anyone that can come.

Kelli :o)

Just keeps getting better

Dad moved to the VA Hospital on Thursday, April 26. Mom says that he had the best day yet on Friday. Dad took the move very well, we worried about set backs but there have been none. The staff at the VA Hospital are very attentive to dad's needs and continually teaches him independence. He told us this weekend that he like that they let him do things. He has already charmed the nurses with his humor and has started drawing again. He gets frustrated but know with time he will only get better. We are all excited about his progress.

Today they are going to do another swallow test so hopefully he will be getting some real food soon. The halo is due for review on May 3 so we should have so up and coming news on the removal of that.

If you are able to come to Indy and see dad he is missing the company. Andy and Anna and thier entire families came down over the weekend and Joe has been here since last Thursday, he really enjoyed this. Things will be quiet during the week as everyone goes back to work so feel free to come and see him when you can.

Thank you for your continued dedication of prayers. Continue to pray for dad's healing and that he will have patience in the recovery.

Have a great day!! Kelli :o)

changes again.....

the last time we posted, we were planning on the move to Minneapolis. mom had her mind set and was going along with the plan. well, change is the name of the game when it comes to the VA. the VA decided that dad is too far along in the recovery to send him to Minneapolis. they then proceeded to tell us that there was no room for him in the Indianapolis facility --- where he belonged. after some really hard work on kelli's behalf, the VA has agreed to open up a room and move dad down to Indianapolis. this is a rehab facility for brain trauma patients. needless to say, it will be nice to have dad closer to home so we can help with the recovery process. this move will take place tomorrow (april 26th) at 10:00 a.m. please pray for an uneventful ride down there.

mom will be temporarily moving in with kelli since she lives in fishers. i believe that all things happen for a reason....including the closing of the Minnesota door and the opening of the indy door. also, kelli just moved back from arizona a little over a year ago and i am convinced that God brought her here for this whole process with dad.

dad's recovery steps are daily. he has passed all of the milestones that the therapists put in place. he is very determined to get home. we have to continually tell him that we will go home at some point, but not yet.

please pray for the following: 1) the move will go smoothly without much of a setback to dad -- each move has been a little bit difficult. 2) mom will continue to have strength through the process -- it has been very tiring to say the least 3) wisdom in planning future housing arrangements

finally, if you happen to find yourself in the indy area, feel free to stop by the VA hospital and visit with dad. he always likes company (I'm sure mom wouldn't mind it either :) )

thanks for partnering with us in the rehab process.

Another Move!

I am beginning to feel like a gypsy. Just as we are settling into our new room at Parkview we get the news we will be moving. Due to Jim's VA status, it would be in his best interest to go to Minneapolis, Minnesota VA Brain Trauma Center to continue his rehab program. This may happen as soon as next week, or at the latest, the following. There are a lot of logistics that will have to be worked out in this move, including, how to transport Jim. It's possible he will go by air and I will drive. Needless to say, many details to plan for, in a short amount of time. His length of stay is undetermined at this time.

So far, his time on the rehab floor at Parkview has been good, but not uneventful. He's had some rough days but is improving each day. He talks constantly and this is not Jim. But it is great to hear. He is also interested in his art again which is another answered prayer. He seems to know most people who have come to visit if he's had an ongoing relationship with them. I would encourage you to come visit if you like, before he goes.He does enjoy visitors. But, please check with the nurse before you go in to see if he is doing ok. They do ask for no more then 2-3 at a time. He is in room 1403.

This move will be a strain on our kids. Being 10 hours away from their dad while he is so ill will not be easy. I, also, will miss their help and comfort. I know that God has been faithful through this whole journey and will continue to be.

We will keep you posted as soon as we know more.

I pray you all enjoy this wonderful weather and your families this week-end.

Sue

Moved to the 4th floor

Dad has been moved to the rehab floor on the 4th floor. He will begin his grinding rehab at Parkview today, so pray for him to have patience and not to refuse the help. He has his in and out moments of which he justs says "no".

We had a great day yesterday with only a little aggrevation in the middle of the day. We have found that limiting his stimulation to music and a few people at a time works well, although with this there are still those moments. We are praying that getting back into the rehab program today will give dad new perspective and encouragement for his recovery.

Yesterday was an exciting day for me because it's the first time he actually remembered things he did. He spent an hour telling the nurse about all his drawings and photography shots that are in his room. Although his words didn't always make sense, there was enough right words to figure out what he was saying. I just sat there and cried. Later in the day he spoke to others about his time in Germany and Japan. What a blessing to know he has part of himself again. Since I only come on the weekend, he always amazes me with the new steps he has taken.

Continue to pray for his patience and healing. Each day is a new day.

Kelli

one long day at a time...

it's been a while since i have posted out here. mom has been a faithful "poster" but i figured it was time for me to get something out here. i recently had the opportunity to spend a few hours alone with dad and have a new appreciation for what my mom has been going through day after day. in the past few posts, mom has referenced "the phase that we are in". we are all praying that this "phase" comes and goes quickly. while it is a wonderful thing to see dad heal, the flip side of that is that he is currently very angry and agitated. he requires "round the clock" observance and this is really wearing on mom.

in the phase that dad is in right now, he understands enough to know that he doesn't want to be there anymore, is mobile enough to get to the doors/elevators/etc and is very determined. the hard part is, he doesn't yet have the reasoning or logic to understand that going out is not yet safe for him. this is why he gets angry. this is like dealing with a determined toddler in a strong man's body. frankly, it is hard.

you see, this is a delicate balance. we are so very thankful that we can be in this stage as we all know at one point we wondered if dad would even make it through the night, or open his eyes, or "move with purpose", etc. He has done all of this and much more. He walks, talks, and is getting stronger each day. it is just hard to balance knowing what is best for dad and yet wanting to keep him "happy" in the immediate term.

please pray that we have patience, strength and wisdom during this phase. please pray that this phase quickly moves on and that we can get dad home soon. finally, continue to pray that the insurance stuff is all worked out. mom has some decisions that need to be made within the next week and needs answers and wisdom.

thanks again for partnering with us in lifting up dad from our knees.

Happy Easter

Happy Easter to all of you!

I was spending time alone with the Lord this morning, praising him for all he has done in our lives since Jim's accident,and also praising him for what he has personally done in my life since I gave my life to him almost 30 years ago. Easter is a celebration of hope eternal and present. There has never been a time of realizing that in my life, more than now. There is an old gospel song that rings true the words in my heart. It says, "Because He lives, I can face tomorrow; because He lives, all fear is gone. Because I know He holds the future, life is worth the living just because He lives!" AMEN!

I would be a fool and a liar if I told you I never have fear or sadness or anxiety. If this would all depend on me, I'd be so hopeless. But, He does live. And he holds the future for each of us, including my Jim. With the help of all of you and trusting God is leading, we will keep walking in Faith.

Thank you all for the encouragement on my last post. It really helped on a bad week. Jim is still going through a very hard time. It's not only hard on him but on our kids and grand kids, as well. Please continue to pray they will stay encouraged.

I do have a prayer request beyond Jim, that would mean much to me because it is a big concern right now. The week Jim had his accident, my mom lost her husband, my stepdad, Ed. Her and I spent alot of time together during his long illness and I now do not have that time to be with her. My sister and brother are taking on my time and help with her, but she is really struggling with depression and loneliness, not only with her loss of Ed, but Jim's accident. She does not drive and is dependent on us to take her anywhere. Please pray we can find a way to help her not feel so lonely and isolated.

Thanks to all and I will keep you posted. Jim may be moving again this week.

Sue

It's been a rough week. The move to Parkview has been filled with many obstacles and new challenges. The stimulation of the transition seems to have brought on a new phase of Jim's injury and it's not a pleasant one. He's very aggravated and confused. He does not do well when I am not around but has become more mobil. He impulsively gets out of bed, causing much anxiety to the staff and myself. He is not steady on his feet but is getting stronger every day making him harder to navigate. This particular rehab floor does not typically provide sitters for this type of patient so I've needed to stay at the hospital from morning till night, for his safety. After Monday, they were able to secure a nighttime sitter who comes at 11pm till 7am. This has all been extremely hard on Jim. The immediate future plans are up in the air due to paperwork and authorization from pending insurance sources. Please pray that this will be worked out in the near future to help Jim get the best care he needs.

I hate to keep asking for your prayers, but God listens to his people and the need is urgent. Thank you for allowing us to be so open and needy. You are being used by God for great things and a powerful witness to many. Thank you all.

Sue

Moving Day!

Moving day came quickly. Friday afternoon it was decided that Jim's return to Parkview would be imminent. Packing up all that we had accumulated in the 5 week stay and hugging goodbye all our new friends at St Joe Select, we began our next step in the healing process. Due to forthcoming paperwork from the VA, Jim is on the 5th floor rehab, room 515. Hopefully we will soon get him moved to 4th floor, intensive rehab. Praise God that we have come this far! It has now been over 10 weeks.

If you still would like to know how you can pray for him, this would be one we would request. That his paperwork would go through as we hope and there will not be any setbacks. Also, that he will adjust to the changes and not take a step backwords. He is getting impatient with the halo and it has caused some concern. Also, I have been down with a bug and my family has been overloaded with extra of my time. We are all getting tired. Pray we will not fall down, but finish the race.

Again, and again, thank you all for your support and prayers. The journey continues, with God leading the way. I do not know the end, but I do know the Keeper of the end. May God bless each and every one of you.

Sue

SMILE

It seems the times are getting longer between post and I'm sorry. But the reason is good. Much is going on and we are all busy trying to regroup and make up for lost time, both with our lives and helping Jim each day.

The week-end, and Monday and today has been somewhat eventful. With waking up, Jim is discovering more items to mess with. Like his trach(he decided on Friday to yank it out. Sorry Dr Culp!) Bill Culp had just been so kind to put a shorter one in on Thursday. Fortunately, Joe, our son, was there to help; and fortunately, I wasn't! It was no easy task getting it back in. Mr Independence also decided to try to take a walk on his own and gave the nurse and I a good scare, not to mention aging me more than he already has. He now has a companion to keep him company at night.

Therapy is going fairly well, although he is having a lot of back pain so it's harder to walk for any length of time. His therapy team, Andy, Connie, Toni, Jolyn, Grace and Mike, have immense amounts of patience, skill and compassion. They treat him as they would a family member and we all see their dedication.

We have been able to enjoy a few outings in the courtyard, due to nice weather. I can't imagine how it must feel after being cooped up so long. Jim's smile blesses all of us and he already has most of his nurses wrapped around his finger... in the nicest way.

Jim's halo, for his broken neck, comes equipped with a wrench for emergency. I saw him eyeing it and trying to unscrew a couple of bolts. I forewarned the nurses he has a construction background and they'd better hide the wrench! They took heed. Dr. Young was summoned to make sure Jim didn't make any headway on his de-haloing project.

Yesterday, I walked in as Dr. Young was examining Jim's work on the halo and I pulled him aside to ask when he thought the trach would be safe to come out. "It's out!" he announced. Boy, things happen fast around there. Apparently the pulmonary Dr agreed with Jim and thought it should come out. (Surprise, Bill!) That husband of mine has always been one step ahead of his time.

One more thing to share. I was with him all afternoon on Sunday and he didn't utter a word to me. I was getting ready to walk out the door, said good by as I heard, "Where you going?" I looked back to see Jim smiling.

This truly is a walk of faith and surprises. God is so good.

Love to you all....please keep praying.

Sue
For those interested, I sometimes post about our journey on my own blog.
http://mariesue.blogspot.com

An Easter Miracle

The miracle of Easter has never been more real to me than it is this year. The King of Kings, and the Lord of Lords has visited my life in the most amazing ways thru this experiance of Jims accident. He has, for reasons I may never know, chosen to show us in the most personal of ways, his power, might and deep love. Many weeks ago, I asked God to just let me see my husbands eyes. Not only did he answer my prayer, but in more ways than I can number, provided miracle after miracle, and love abounding. A week or so ago, Jason numbered the many answered prayers we received, against all odds. Many, many of you have been the angels arms of comfort, encouragement, love and practical needs. But today, I was given a gift for my heart, from God, thru Jim, to me. I heard the words, " I Love You," come from my husbands own mouth.

If you have followed Jim's story of recovery from the beginning, and the chances of this ever happening, you will celebrate with me this miracle of love. God is so good, all the time. Alleluia!

Sue

New things each day...

Our apologies for the length of time between posts. Dad is improving one way or another each day. Since the last post, here are a few of the things that have taken place: he has walked with a walker -- by himself -- from one end of the hall to the other; he has had his trach capped and no longer has extra oxygen used; he has started saying words here and there; and some of his words have turned into sentences.

We have been working on getting some of the more "automatic words" to come out with hopes that it leads to purposeful speaking. An example would be a phone conversation between him and one of us where we would say often used phrases like "hey dad, it's jay" and he would respond with "ya" -- it even got to "hey dad, i've gotta go, have a good night; could i please talk to joe" to which he would respond with "ok, goodnight" and then hand the phone back to joe.

Now, with all the good stuff comes some tough stuff. Over the weekend, dad looked mom square in the eyes and said, "I don't know what happened". He is finally coming to the realization of what is going on. With this realization comes tough stuff to deal with. Dad seems to be more down over the past few days, we are assuming that he is realizing what is going on and dealing with it. Please pray for his courage and encouragement to keep fighting.

Finally, there are some unresolved administrative issues that need to be worked out and we'd appreciate the prayers for wisdom. Thanks for your love and encouragement.

afternoon adventure..

What a beautiful day it was! Andy, Jim's therapist, worked Jim hard yesterday. Connie, occupational therapy and Toni, speech therapy did, as well.

As I entered the room, Jim was resting on the mat. The energy he is expending to complete the simplest of task that you and I take for granted every day is enormous.

I have gone back to work in the mornings and look forward to rushing to the hospital each afternoon to see the latest progress. Yesterday, Andy had a surprise for Jim. It had been 55 days since Jim had been outside of the hospital walls. I had asked, and been given permission, to take him out into the fresh air.

As Andy got Jim back on his feet to complete the final stage of his therapy for the day, I could hear groans coming from his newly capped trach. This, also, was a new milestone. Capping the trach means Jim is breathing completely on his own. It also allows, with the help of a passover device, him to talk if he can. Speech therapy has worked diligently on getting him to form a word. As I sat and watched Andy get him in position for the parallel bars, I suddenly heard a familiar voice saying, "Oh, boy." I turned to look at my sons, Andy and Joe and new instantly, they heard it too. Praise God! All of the therapy staff responded. Yeah! It is the beginning of, hopefully, more to come.

With Andy encouraging Jim to complete his work, with the promise of a surprise adventure to come, Jim painstakingly walked the few necessary steps on the bars, then stepped up one step on the stairs.

Work completed, and back in his wheelchair, we headed for the elevator and down to the main floor of the hospital. I could tell from Jim's expression he realized something was different. When we reached the main door and wheeled him through it, the biggest smile came to his face!
God gave us a beautiful sunny, warm day to enjoy. We walked to the court yard and sat, just enjoying being alive. Of course I can't speak for my husband(nor would he want me to) but I believe with all my heart, he was thankful for the moment and breath!

Thank you Lord.

Sue

great determination...

Today was very similar to most days at the hospital. Speech and Occupational therapy come in the morning/early afternoon to work with dad and then dad gets a slight break. After dads slight break, Andy(the therapist) begins to work with dad.

When i walked in, dad was sitting at a table with one of the therapist. She was trying to get dad to pull on a plug that is pushed into a hole, pick it up and put it in her hand. Dad was more interested in sleeping. This has been a normal thing in a way. She continued to try to wake him...he would open his eyes for a sec and then fall back to "sleep". He finally grabbed a hold of that plug and pulled it out of the hole....6 times! The therapist was very thrilled with this. When he was done, he rested for about 15 mins and then it was time to get up into his wheelchair and go over to the parallel bars. This is where Andy can lift dad up and dad can support himself on the bars. Dad did this several times and one time while he was standing, the therapist told dad that he could sit now...they even tried to help him sit, but dad was determined to stand. It was the look on his face that "this is killing me, but i am going to get out of here!" He ended up standing for 4 mins. This in itself is a huge task, but it doesn't end there. When they finally got dad sitting in his wheelchair, it was mentioned to dad that he needs to start using his legs and move himself around in the chair. Dad gave another look of determination and started moving his feet as if he was trying to move his wheel chair! This is a huge thing. That meant that he understood what was asked of him. This is great news.

Please pray specifically that dad will get very good rest at night so that he can work during the day and be awake. Please also pray that dad doesn't lose the determination and get discouraged. Be thankful for all of the progress that has been made! We will attempt to update you during the end of the week.

Work in progress

Today was hard work for Jim. His therapy team, Andy, Mike, Connie, Toni and Jolyn, as well as a few others,(sorry, not sure of every ones name yet) gave their best effort to help Jim start to recover some of his lost functions. When I arrived, he was sitting on the edge of the bed in the physical therapy room, surrounded by this marvelous team of people encouraging him to try to sit up and respond to simple commands. I am learning quickly that a brain injury is a complicated and frustrating recovery. God created us and our brain in such a way, no man can duplicate. Trying to fix or heal the brain without his divine intervention and blueprint would be impossible. These highly trained and dedicated team of people use all of their skills, creativity and muscle to help that process along. I am in awe of their skills,compassion ,dedication and sense of humor. There is no doubt, they care about Jim's recovery.

It is so hard to watch Jim struggle with the simplest of things, that just a short few weeks ago, he did without thinking. But I, as well as the rest of our family, am so grateful he is in the struggle. We have been blessed from the beginning of his accident to be surrounded by compassionate, highly trained, caring medical staff. While at Parkview ICU we were privileged to have wonderful nurses such as Tom, Randy, Linda, Chuck and many, many more. When Jim was at his most fragile, they nursed him as if he was their own. They also put up with our multiple questions, concerns, my crying spells and fears with much patience. There is no way I will ever be able to let them know how much they all mean to us.

May our mighty God bless each and every one of them for their dedication, skill and compassion.
If you happen to see one of them or have the privilege to be under any of the above mentioned staff, please let them know how grateful we all are.

As for all of you dear friends and family, I want you to know, we do not know how we would have survived the past 7 weeks without your support and love. I know we have said this many times but I can't say it enough. You are the best! And we are so blessed.

The days and weeks ahead will be grueling, trying to learn to live this new life. Jim has to fight to learn the tiniest thing, we all can do without blinking an eye. I know he has it in him, but it hurts so much to watch. I don't know what the future holds, but, I do know who holds the future and I will try to rest in that.

May God bless you, each and everyone.

Sue

God is Good

X-rays show no fluid today, no fever. Waiting on the results of other cultures taken, otherwise all is good today. Praise God!!

New Complication

Yesterday Dad started to run a 102.6 fever, he now has fluid on his lungs. Because of the halo they cannot do the procedure to remove the fluid. Please pray for the healing of Dad's lungs and that his fever will subside.

Kelli